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Feel Like Your Vagina Is Too Small To Have Sex

When intercourse isn’t possible or you feel like your vagina is too small to have sex there could be some underlying causes for this. Everyone is capable of sex. It is biologic. It is okay. It is normal. It should feel good for BOTH parties. And there should be enjoyment and pleasure involved.  

But much of the time in society women will experience sex that hurts or isn’t comfortable or sex is just not possible becuase the vaginal opening is too small or we are simply conditioned to believe that sex is taboo. That our vaginas are so private that we the owners of “said vaginas’ ‘ aren’t even allowed to touch them. But just like we can not truly wholeheartedly love others, unless we love ourselves. We can not full heartedly enjoy sex until we can enjoy and love all our body parts, including our vaginas. 

Society has conditioned us much of the time to see our own vulvas and vaginas as off limits. This can cause issues with these very important body parts. 

People who experience pain in their vulva and or vagina could have a diagnosis called dyspareunia, vaginismus or vulvodynia. Sometimes there could be a traumatic event, a surgery, an underlying diagnosis or a perceived trauma that can cause these different issues. 

Today we are going to explore the diagnosis of Vaginismus.  

Vaginismus is a diagnosis that describes vaginal penetration as difficult, painful or impossible. 

Most of the time it is due to muscle spasms and those spasms are happening in the pelvic floor muscles. The spasm occurs in response to a real or perceived painful stimulus. This spasm then becomes a conditioned response and can be present during foreplay, any type of arousal and during intercourse. 

One reason it is so important not to push your body through painful intercourse is because we want to condition our brains and body to know that sex feels good, sex is normal, sex is pleasurable and everyone is entitled to have positive enjoyment with sexual experiences. And not condition our brains to brace and guard for sex because we know or think that it is going to be painful 

A huge factor in vaginismus is that we often feel shame talking about sex and vaginas. 

People that experience vaginismus often have these symptoms: 

-Unable to insert a tampon or menstrual cup 

– Unable to tolerate penetrative intercourse or penetration of any kind 

– Unable to tolerate gynecologic examination or a speculum during a pap smear

– Pain in the lower abdominal area, hips and low back. 

There can be many causes of Vaginismus however what we see clinically is that usually vaginismius wasn’t noticed, until someone was unable to engage in sex on their wedding night, or began after an unwanted sexual encounter or for someone experiencing a lot of stress and anxiety in their life. 

For anyone experiencing vaginismus, the goal is to help decrease the muscle spasms and tightness of the pelvic floor and hip musculature and to increase the flexibility of those muscles. There is a brain body connection to the pelvic floor, so there are exercises that can help condition the brain to help keep the pelvic floor relaxed. Healing vaginismus is 100% possible for you. In our office, no one will ever ask you to share your traumas or your experiences that may have led you to experiencing these muscle spasms. There is always room to be healed,  held and supported regardless of whether or not you are ready to share pieces of your story. 

At Body Motion, we love helping people see that there is help for them. Many women come after not being able to have sex since they got married but are wanting to be able to have penetrative intercourse so they can get pregnant. This is 100% possible. 

Many women come after experiencing trauma that they may or may not be ready to dive into but they now have a partner that they want to be able to have positive sexual experiences with. 

Regardless of where you are at in your journey of vaginismus, we are here to help you and will meet you where you are. 

Just because you start pelvic floor PT to help heal your vaginismus and “make it” through sex. Doesn’t mean we will just start with internal therapies. Treatment and evaluation is consensual and puts you 100% in charge. The provider you see at Body Motion will suggest next steps and will also be in communication with you if you are not ready for next steps in your treatment and healing journeys. There are ways to start healing your vaginismus without just having to start inside the vagina to stretch the muscles. We take it seriously that your comfort and trust in this process is a huge part of your ability to heal the vaginismus. 

Please reach out to schedule a Free Consultation today if you feel like your ready to get back to having enjoyable sexual experiences. 

AUTHOR

Allison Feldt

Body Motion Physical Therapy

"We Help Women Through Fertility, Pregnancy, Birth, Postpartum and Beyond So They Can Live Active, Confident, Healthy Lives Without The Need For Medication Or Surgery"
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